What’s wrong with Christianity, God?

(“Christians are hard to tolerate, I don’t know how Jesus does it.” BONO)

 God, what’s wrong with Christianity?

No, you go first, what do you think is wrong with it?

That's a bit weird, you’re supposed to do the telling, not the asking.

Really? Is that what the old manuscripts teach – I do the telling and not the asking??

No, but that’s what Christianity teaches.

Which brings us back to my question – what’s wrong with Christianity?  Let’s pretend no one else would ever get to read this, what would your answer be then?

Well, according to just about every pastor I talk to, there’s nothing wrong with Christianity. They all say, ‘Jesus is happy with his church’.

All of them?

A lot of them, that’s for sure. Particularly their own churches. Research shows that most of them realise it’s not true, but that’s what they say, ‘Jesus is happy with his church’, it’s almost like a recorded message, ‘Jesus is happy with his church’.

And you think that’s a bit short sighted?

Well, yes. Those same pastors tell us we should look at the early church – they say that’s what Christianity should look like.

And, what’s your point?

Well, you made it clear to John that you weren’t very happy with the early church – you didn’t like the results of their churchy Christian culture.

And?

Well, if you weren’t happy with theirs, you’re probably not super excited about ours.

Ok, pastors say there’s nothing wrong, but what do you think?

You mean Christian culture, the way us Christians tend to behave, the things normal people see when they look at our lifestyles?

Yes.

Alright, I’ll answer: Everything! I think everything is wrong with Christianity. But, God, if anyone ever reads this, they’ll say we mustn’t criticise the Church, (even though you were always criticising it in your day). They’ll say I’m influenced by the devil, that I have a bitter root judgement and need to forgive, that their church isn’t like that, etc, etc.

Relax. They said I was demon possessed.

Ok, sure, but in the end it gets tiresome. I think Bono was right. He said, “Christians are hard to tolerate, I don’t know how Jesus does it.”

So, then, tell me straight, what do you think is wrong with Christianity?

Alright, fine: Our day-to-day culture is so far removed from reality that we really are pretty hard to tolerate. Normal people find us so religious it’s painful, and yet we pretend that’s because they’re not ‘Spirit-led’.

We ignore the fact that we’re often pushy, judgemental, small-minded – and instead of having the courage to accept the rest of the world might be right about us – we justify our embarrassing behaviour. We fool ourselves that we’re behaving like you did, but we couldn’t be further from the truth.

And how does that make you feel?

Like it makes everyone else feel – speechless, gobsmacked – how could we be so bloody stupid? If normal Christian behaviour is ‘Spirit-led’ then no wonder the rest of the world doesn’t want to have anything to do with that Spirit.

‘Normal Christian behaviour’?

We’re church-focused. You were the opposite. We’re pastor-focused, you were the opposite. We ask people embarrassing questions at inappropriate times, like, ‘would you like a personal friend in Jesus?’ If they weren’t already wanting to push us away, that finishes it. And, anyway, we associate mainly with other Christians…

And I was the opposite?

Well, yes! You hardly ever hung out with church people, you were always with the partygoers, thieves and prostitutes. Or maybe I’m wrong??

No, you’re not, but imagine for a minute that you are. Imagine if the meaning of ‘abundant life’ really was going to church all the time, tithing to keep the church profitable, socialising mostly with other churchy Christians, expecting the pastor to tell you what I’m saying, praying at me in the early mornings, slavishly listening to Christian music instead of the true musical masters– what if that really was my plan for humanity??

The idea makes me shudder! And that’s my whole point. There’s no way that’s what you had in mind, (please say it’s not!) and yet it’s the story Christianity tells!

I’ll tell you what I think; we’ve become the biggest pain in the backside to those we have the audacity to call ‘the lost’, the tallest barrier between you and them. You were all about them, but we’re not, most of us don’t even know how to relate to them, and because of our heads-in-the-sand attitudes they think we’re the lost ones, and some days I think they just might be right.